Touching the Void…

Climb the mountain, acknowledge the enormity of the effort it took to get there, sit on the peak, drink some tea, and then have a good long and hard think about what to do next.

That is me, this is me, here we all are with nowhere else left to go.

The feeling isn’t like While E Coyote eventually catching the Road Runner, but it isn’t too distant a cousin not to be invited to family gatherings.

The act is done, the curtains have swished across the boards and now we occupy that infinitesimally small space, that pause between velvet touching itself and the hoped for gasp and then clap of an appreciative audience (double entendre?).

If only.

I have no idea if my one-man show will sell or indeed if those that attend will like the show, and so the spiral ever tightens – not knowing is insufferable.

 The cover format is incorrect – this will be rectified, but the process is almost becoming a punishment (political satire?).  

The book isn’t perfect – no book ever is.

Imperfect as it is, it does deserve a reader, and the reader truly is a lesser being for not having followed Miss Amy Grace.

A strong no nonsense female character, flawed, contradictory, obsessively focused on her own plight, always brave, emotionally vulnerable and oh so in need of a loving hug…

And we have Thomas Payne, not a one-dimensional matinee villain twirling his moustache while he ties a woman to the railway tracks…  he grows, he evolves, he becomes so much more than he was on page one.  Redemption exists for all. 

Four hundred or so pages. 

Page turners each and every one.

The first of July cometh and with it our release of the first volume of Amy’s adventures.

Hug those you love, stay safe, and do your very best to remain sane.

A body that casts no shadow. 

All that anguish, all panic, and in the end the stone thrown into the mill pond that is Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) will cause not so much as a ripple.

It’s not until you dive in, that you truly realize just how large the KDP body of water is.

1,400,000 title EVERY year – it’s a truly mind-numbing number.

So, how do you stand out in the crowd?

Being famous (notorious even) would help – alas I’m neither.

An advertising budget that would make the “Big Five” (Penguin Random House, HarperCollins, Hachette Livre, Simon & Schuster, or Macmillan) blush – don’t have that either.

Okay, then tap into your social media presence or all those followers of your website….  Ah, and again NOPE.

So, what are my options other than relying on blind luck for my book to reach the attention of readers?

Truthfully, I don’t know.

Many will attempt to sell me a service, many will claim to have magic beans, but I think I’ll keep a firm hold of the cow.

That knot tied by Mr Gordion looks more and more impossible with each tick and tock of the clock.

When writing, my problem was ‘what happens next,’ and now that deed has been done, I am somewhat at sea as to selecting my next realistic option.

I cannot throw more money at the project – that way madness lies. 

While I wrestle with that particular conundrum I will continue to type away and give life to the tale of two Iceni women – who history has somewhat abandoned under the shadow of their incredibly famous mother.  The Fox, The Greyhound and The Bull continue apace.

Maybe the telling of the adventures of Heanua and Lannosea will be the success that will bring light to the plight of young Miss Amy Grace?

Who knows.

What is that they say “l’art pour l’art,” lose sight of that and we are all doomed.

Stay safe, hug those you love, and remember you could have fussed over a manuscript for nearly a decade, put it out to alpha, beta, gamma or indeed delta readers, had it professionally edited, AND still only found a spelling error (only one) when you attempted to upload the script into KDP.

Amy Grace: Payne – available via KDP (Kindle and Paperback) 01/06/26

Strangers on a shore…

Not an ode to jazz, more a short ramble about crippling imposter syndrome in relation to my declared intent to publish the engaging narrative that is “Amy Grace: Payne”.

The book is written and has been so for several years.

Is it the absolute best iteration of itself – I don’t know, and that is the question that haunts me.

I know it’s a good tall tale, the story is engaging, different, and all those things that should keep the reader engaged while licking their finger and turning the page to eagerly find out what happens next.

However, is the telling up to the job? 

That is the spectre that haunts my waking day.

I’ve hidden behind the cover design and text formatting; in fact, I’ve used any and every reason real and imagined to delay publishing this book.

But eventually even the most reluctant author must stand and be counted.

The naval gazing, the woe is me, the hand to forehead flouncy shirt wearing dramatics – it all must end.

If I fail spectacularly, if the reception of my work is to condemn it as toe curling cringe, then so be it, the sun will still come up on the morrow. 

I quote it often, and I should live it: “It’s NOT the critic that counts…”

Print, embrace, and relish the ride.

Hug those you love, stay safe, and do your absolute best to remain sane!