This could be a momentous moment hitting this marker in my blog, entry number 151 could be a statement of so many things, and in a way it is. I’ve persevered, I’ve kept the faith, ignored the nay sayers and retained belief in my project.
Post #1 back in June 2017 acknowledged the potential for this entire process to be nothing more than self-indulgence.
I don’t often quote myself, but this from #1 still holds true:
I suppose I see this blog as kind of akin to being given access to a great palatial auditorium, yet one in which you will have to speak confidently into a darkened room – maybe people are out there in the cheap seats listening – maybe they’re not. But if you don’t speak, you’ll never know…
I’ve tripped, stumbled, and committed more than a few faux pas along the journey. Ideas that were written down in the firm belief that they were perfection personified have been either heavily amended, or indeed suffered under the editors cut.
We’ve learnt some powerful lessons thus far.
On my wall I’ve a framed copy of Theodore Roosevelt’s “Man in The Arena” speech. It wasn’t written for writers, wasn’t written all those years ago as a cleverly placed egg for me to discover, but boy is it relevant and uplifting.
“…who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
Version #1 of my favourite tall tale has improved over the years, the telling has evolved, the journey still pulls on your heartstrings, still makes you cry… and I’m immensely proud of that.
The easiest reference I have for Amy Grace is still in drawing parallels with ‘Lisbeth Salander’ in the world of ‘Sally Lockhart.’ We have this baseline upon which we’ve added a layer of steampunk and a healthy dose of magic, fairy tales and Celtic folklore.
The tales pull no punches, but it doesn’t exploit, trivialise, or try to use suffering as a form of spank bank entertainment. Cruelty is shown for what it is, resilience too. Recovery is a theme that weaves through all (currently five) volumes of Amy’s tale. She is a flawed woman, but understandably so. She isn’t a two-dimensional character dependent upon rescue, she is her own woman (Bechdel and Mako Mori take a bow). And those bad folk, those who are the villains, these aren’t mustachio twirling caricatures either. Our main villain is cruel, sadistically so, but he finds love, finds loss, and finds a path to redemption too.
Amy Grace and her struggles, her journey, her loves, and her losses, all these we have catalogued, all these we have told.
My tales aren’t perfection, aren’t stories that will forever change your life and have you shaving your head while living in a remote log cabin – lit candles and incantations. These aren’t entry level cult material, but they are captivating and entertaining – oh, I didn’t see that coming tall tales that once you start you will just have to, absolutely must see what happens next.
And therein lies my perennial problem.
Nobody’s read them.
Well, some friends family and strangers have – my heartfelt thanks go to them all.
All who all now look at me with a somewhat quizzical and wary eye – WTF, how/why from where did you imagine that?!?
This pool has been relatively small, but feedback has been overwhelmingly positive.
I have options to improve my lot, choices to make in order to bring Amy to a wider audience, and on these issues, I worry, overthink, and stumble.
For those from the outside looking in, some may be screaming away the obvious answer, the clear solution to my problems – hopefully, I’ll see it soon too.
I ended post #1 thanking the darkened auditorium for sharing the journey with me, and to those of you still sitting out there in the cheap seats, or to those who’ve stumbled upon my musings – THANK YOU.
Keep the faith, stay safe and remain sane!